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Nov. 7th, 2015 09:23 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
hurricanelauraWell it just happened. John broke up with me. He said that he wasn't happy and it wasn't either of our faults.
I was numb as I helped him clear off the spare bed. I started taking my pillow and blanket off of our (now former) bed, but he insisted that I take our normal bed, which I guess is fair considering how mine had gotten wrecked when we first moved in.
Sleeping alone in that bed for the first time since he left for a month in Nepal last year, I felt restless and lost. What the hell just happened? What happened to the last 6 years of our life together? What happened to me in those 6 years that made him not love me anymore? These questions raced through my mind as I tried to wrap my mind around the whole thing. Sobbing, I texted the only friend I felt I could trust with this information being so new and raw, my friend Joachim in Germany. My very good friend for almost 20 years. He offered me virtual hugs and assured me that he was there if I needed to talk.
I decided that I just couldn't sit in that room another minute. Fuck this room. Fuck this bed. Fuck that asshole probably sleeping like a baby in the next room. I gathered myself up and headed out to the one place I have always gone to comfort me when my life takes a wrong turn down Shit Ave. I took myself dancing at The Chamber.
I was numb as I helped him clear off the spare bed. I started taking my pillow and blanket off of our (now former) bed, but he insisted that I take our normal bed, which I guess is fair considering how mine had gotten wrecked when we first moved in.
Sleeping alone in that bed for the first time since he left for a month in Nepal last year, I felt restless and lost. What the hell just happened? What happened to the last 6 years of our life together? What happened to me in those 6 years that made him not love me anymore? These questions raced through my mind as I tried to wrap my mind around the whole thing. Sobbing, I texted the only friend I felt I could trust with this information being so new and raw, my friend Joachim in Germany. My very good friend for almost 20 years. He offered me virtual hugs and assured me that he was there if I needed to talk.
I decided that I just couldn't sit in that room another minute. Fuck this room. Fuck this bed. Fuck that asshole probably sleeping like a baby in the next room. I gathered myself up and headed out to the one place I have always gone to comfort me when my life takes a wrong turn down Shit Ave. I took myself dancing at The Chamber.
